Sunday blues

Sunday afternoon and the weekend is winding down, which inevitably means that the usual Sunday blues is gaining momentum. The chores have stacked up, the rest time has evaporated and the busy week ahead is lurking in the shadows. Scott said, "Sunday afternoons are always a drag. They'd be better if...if Ben was here." Unfortunately, I remember feeling Sunday Blues even when Ben was here.

Ben started his classes today, being on a Sunday-Thursday week. In real time, he has finished his first class and it is 2 a.m. for him. He should be sleeping, but who knows? Today he seems farther away than he has all week because we can't reach him. The cell number we have must have been copied down wrong. I realized I don't even have his address! Not being able to reach him feels like the world has opened up and swallowed him. I've emailed him with the subject saying URGENT and have posted a comment on his blog asking him to check his email. He has not responded.

I can see that if someone were reading this blog, they might presume that all I do is think about Ben. That is not accurate. I have a busy life, I work and do other things. I spend a lot of time with family. But this is a good outlet for my feelings about Ben. It is momentous when the first born leaves home and forges their own path. The sealed gate gaurding the homefront has been breached. The light of independence shines through the broken gate and the younger ones are drawn to it. In our home, the gate is always unlocked, and can swing both ways.